Saturday, June 21, 2014

Born sexy?

It's not all about the looks!

As women, being sexy is something we all have to deal with, like it or not.  Some people innately have sex appeal and have to put forth very little effort to be sexy and some of us have to work at it.

Just about every one can be sexy -- if they really want to.  You can't just throw up your hands in despair and give up. You have to put in some effort.  In other words "do the work".

I had a very close girlfriend (she has since passed away) who was very skinny and very quirky, to the point of being considered weird by most of the women in our group, but... the men really loved her!  We could never figure out why.  

Well, one thing I know she was good at, was flirting.  OMG!  To the women in our circle, her flirting appeared too obvious, over the top and a bit contrived, but the men seemed to eat it up.  She was also very attentive.  She listened to their stories and seemed to hang on every word. She looked deep into their eyes (giving them the batting eyes) as they spoke and she did a LOT of touching.  She was a master of what I think they call flirting touch.

This all worked very well for my friend, because it was part of her personality, part of who she was.  She wasn't putting on any act, this was truly her. is not me!

And, if it is not you, there are some other things we can do to be Sexy at ANY age!

1. Be confident - Nothing is more sexy than confidence (not cockiness). This works for both men and women.   If you feel good about yourself, it will show.

2. Be independent - In this day and age not many men are looking for someone to take care. 

3. Stay in shape - Of course this varies depending on your age, but just about anybody can do some sort of exercise, even if it's only walking each day.  Walking is good for you and will make you feel better to boot.

4. Pay attention to what you wear! - (If you are reading this blog, you probably already have this one in the bag)  A well dressed, put together woman will always get a glance (from men and women).  This also shows that you care about yourself.

5. Be yourself - It's never a good idea to try to be someone or something that you are not.  We are all unique with our own qualities. That's what makes us special.  Don't try to copy.  If you have a sense of humor, show it.  If you are a brainiac, don't be afraid to show it (of course you don't have to go overboard at first)  Like sports? are you an artist? musician?  Whatever it is, it's important to be natural.  Be authentic.  In the end he will find out who you are anyway, so no sense in pretending.

6. Love you life! - Loving your life is an expression of loving yourself.  Be a complete person, happy with yourself and who you are. 

You don't have to be the most attractive lady out there to be sexy, 
you just have to love who you are and use what you got!
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  1. i not only love your confidence, i deeply admire it. i am taking this to heart!

  2. I agree with with all six...the same things I teach on my blog! Confidence is attractive! Loved the post.

  3. Thanks
    Contrary to the Essence poll taken about losing sexiness after 64, I've found that I have become more sexy (in an intellectual way:)) and I attribute it to becoming more confident and comfortable in my own skin. I'm still not the most attractive woman if you had to choose looks but I can hold my own once a man gets in a conversation with me. Doesn't mean I still don't wish I had that other kind of sex appeal! lol